Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Valentine's Day Special--Worst Date Ever
We've all had them. Dates from hell.
In lieu of Valentine's Day, I thought it would be fun to share some torturous moments that all of us are forced to endure--dating. God help you if you are in the dating pool with the sharks and cads. What ever happened to men actually wooing a woman? We used to ask, "Did you kiss him on the first date?" Can anyone actually remember that? In today's world it's, "Did you sleep with him on the first date?" Are you freaking kidding me? No woo... no can do!
Prior to meeting my wonderful dh of 21 years, I had some winners. I'm hoping someone can top me!
I double-dated (aren't those the best?) with a friend of mine and a 'college boy,' only to be taken to a cemetery in the dark hours of the night. Mmm... maybe if I was Bella and the guy looked even remotely close to Edward or Jacob.
Another date I had was with a man who worked at Daily's. When we found out we had absolutely nothing in common, he proceeded to instruct me the entire time on the different products Daily's made. You know, orange juice, popsicles. Yes, let's talk about popsicles and all of the different flavors offered for two hours straight! Yikes!
So I'm attending a really nice dinner and having a reasonable conversation with a seemingly normal guy. Bill comes. "I don't have my wallet." Kill me now.
While I'm ranting, let's go back 'several' years. Prom Night. My 'escort' popped an entire box of No Dose and was ill the entire night. I managed to have a good time by myself, but seriously.
And the best for last... I'm in college. Far away from home. Made a few friends and this is my first college date. He drops me off and is sitting in my living room. He wipes the sweat from his brow and starts to look unwell. "Victoria, there's something I must tell you." Casting me a serious look, he grabs my hand. "I worship the devil. If you want, I can bring him here right now." Pulling out Runes from his pocket, he tosses them on my table.
How could I possibly make this up? Care to share your worst date ever?