Saturday, March 13, 2010

Is Chivalry Dead?

I hope that chivalry is not dead, but I'm afraid it may be true!
Look around you. I have and I'm not crazy about what I see.           

For instance, public transportation. Love it or hate it; if you work in the city, you probably have to take it.

Every day is an adventure. I see the same faces and silently chuckle at some of their antics. Everyone will get a seat, but yet, everyone will "jockey for position." Where is the train going to pull up? Can I be the first one on even though I take the same seat every morning? Hey, I was on the platform before you, but go ahead. You can cut in front of me. 

I personally thought the women would be the worst, but no! It's actually the men. I have seen men cut in front of women and not give it a second thought. I have seen men take a seat and leave a woman to stand. I have even seen men sit and leave a pregnant woman stand. Where has the chivalry gone? I did not burn my bra!           

I have had doors slammed in my face, been elbowed in the head, been bumped and pushed without so much as an apology. If I walk through a door, I hold it for the person behind me. It's common courtesy! It doesn't matter if it's a man or a woman--hold the door! I don't understand why it is so hard.

In all fairness, I cannot say it is all men. There are a chosen few who exhibit chivalrous behavior. You know who you are!

My son is one of them. He is a little lad in training. We were coming out of Wendy's one day and a woman was following a man out the door. The man did not hold the door for her and my son was not happy. "Hey! He did not hold the door!" he said matter-of-factly. Hmmm. My son is how old and knows to hold a door? Doesn't anyone have manners anymore? 

My CP's DH still opens her car door and has her walk on the inside when they walk down a street.

A friend of mine opens the car door for his wife, stands when a woman enters the room and will not sit until a woman takes her seat. *sigh* I think I was born in the wrong century.

What about you? Do you have any stories to share of chivalrous behavior? Have you seen it and does it still exist?                        


  1. That is so true! Men have lost their chivalry. What is wrong with men these days?

  2. I'm afraid it's not just chivalry that's dead. I'm afraid it's politeness in general. It seems more and more, everyone is concerned with taking care of #1. We can only hope more parents strive to turn the world back one child at a time like you have with your son. Good job and great post!

  3. I agree. Thanks for stopping by and for your comment!

  4. OMG, I take the train to work, too, and I know exactly what you're talking about. An example that comes to mind is the man who let me and a pregnant woman go in front of him while he held the door. As I turned around to thank him, another man pushed in front of me and nearly knocked me over. The chivalrous guy and I just looked at each other and shook our heads.

    So, it's not dead, but it has taken a beating. :P

  5. I completely agree with you, Victoria. This is also why I started teaching my son how to be a gentleman when he was two. When he was in Kindergarten a teacher witnessed him holding the door for a little girl. She said, "Well, Austin, that was so sweet that you held the door for Lily." And he replied very matter-of-factly, "Well, you know, I AM a gentleman." LOL The teacher actually called me to tell the story she was so impressed. Definitely one of my most proud moments as a mother. My hope is that when he becomes a man, he'll stand for women, open their doors, walk on the outside of a sidewalk, etc. I just don't understand why mothers - you know, being WOMEN and all - wouldn't stress this to their sons just as avidly as they would with everything else they teach. I agree, Victoria. I was also born in the wrong century. ;) Nice post.

  6. Thanks, Gina. We need to ensure our little men set the stage for future generations!

    Thanks for your feedback!